Why I kicked Facebook? (August 2009)

I have been on Facebook for sometime now. Others keep up with Twitter and Orkut too.

Not too long back I followed the numbers on my friend’s list as closely as stock quotes, while keeping track of others rising figures. It was competitive.

Some mentioned to me, ``you have so many (friends) only, I have many more.’’ There were egos involved.

I believe actor Ashton Kutcher has more than a million-list and keeps his fans humored by anecdotes and private pictures of his wife Demi Moore, sometimes in her underwear. My wife would kill me.

For me touching the 100 friends mark was a big day, even as I remain logged now with 250 odd people comprising extended family, close friends, others regurgitated from the past, many cousins, faint acquaintances, some I might have bumped into anywhere, including bank relationship managers and more I just don’t know.

Till some time back, I kept digging for more people I could know.

Today, I am bored of FB as the novelty has worn out. I would prefer to wash my car any day without uploading pictures of me washing the car.

In the past, I grew out of pornography as it is no use watching others having all the fun.

And, I have grown out of FB as I felt it limited my mind, my life – thinking process, work and creativity – which instead focused on buttressing my FB profile.

Perhaps it works fine for big people such as Ashton and other celebrities who need to be in the glare due to marketing and sales needs.

I felt like a vacuous Page 3 party person flashing a funny pose or wearing a short skirt on skinny legs to somehow get pass the editor’s muster and onto the papers the next day.

Except on FB you are your own boss --- and people get to see what you want them to see.

So, I took pictures of places visited subconsciously keeping FB in mind, faking a big smile once on a trip to desert state Rajasthan in height of summer, even as my brain boiled inside.

I perhaps took a holiday or two extra to keep up with the photo updates

In FB everybody has to be having good time like the P3 people, otherwise, he/she would not be on FB. You don’t see too many hospital pictures except for newborns, all very cute, as long as the parents get to do the potty washing.

My ideas also brimmed to keep the new status messages exciting to elicit instant reactions. I was disappointed if they did not.

I even grew a mustache and put up the pictures. I socialized more and met new people to get them onto my FB list.

I took and re-took innumerable quizzes until my smile or sex appeal matched as closest to Tom Cruise and IQ Einstein.

There was even a brief period when I avoided some friends as they could no longer add to the friend list numbers, while I already knew whatever I might have wanted to know about them, courtesy FB.

I requested those who did not FB to begin an account right away. Ideally, I should have been paid by the FB promoters for the free branding.

Today I FB barely five minutes a day, if I do log in. The only comment I have made in the last few weeks is clicking the Like button. Even this is more infrequent.

The whole world seems to be doing the same things --- holding a drink, in the Jacuzzi or at the beach, catching the standard FB moment.

I am sick of looking at pictures of holidays, marriages, the always adorable kids, birthdays, official functions, foreign visits, mum and dad when they were young and grandparents in their youth.

All of this was, of course very exciting at one time as it unfolded the world of so many I had interacted in the past.

To begin with, it was good to know about them until it became all too predictable. It was like a reality show on TV that had lost its punch.

At the same time the curiosity about catching up with an old school mate in real was lost.

Many of them, ex-colleagues, classmates, might have formed part of my daily routine at some point. But, life moves on and a new bunch of relationships develop that takes precedence.

As a matter of fact, I have knocked off a couple of good friends from my list as there was not much to speak about after debating an issue the whole day on FB.

Today, my FB account is more like an online diary which gets automatically updated, should the need arise to get in touch with somebody. This is useful.

But, I don’t look out for names I may or may not know or send out requests to add to my friend list or take off on an exotic holiday to put up the pictures.

I prefer to wash my car any day.

(Siddharth Srivastava is a New Delhi-based journalist. He can be reached as sidsri@yahoo.com)